Today I went scuba diving for the first time in my life. We took a cab out to Robinson Marina, adjacent to Somerset Bridge - the world’s smallest drawbridge. We signed our waivers and collected our equipment: fins, mask, and BCD (Buoyancy Control Device). We got onto the dive boat and set out for open water, with the lesson being given on the way. We learned about clearing your ears as you descent, and what to do if you have a problem during descent, as well as a few hand signals - “fine/ready,” “problem,” “going down,” and “go up.” We also learned about the “giant stride” entry, which is just a big step off the boat’s platform - you have to go wide enough that your tank doesn’t hit on the boat. Once we got out there, we learned we’d be seeing the Constellation/Montana wreck site which was featured in that fabulous late-70’s movie “The Deep.”

When I took my giant stride off the boat, I was surprised by how much I could see. But the BCD had been filled with air, so I bobbed back up and made my way to the place we were told to wait. We kept our faces in the water and practiced breathing through the regulator. I was supposed to keep an eye on A, who was wearing a -4.5 prescription mask even though she needs -9, but I was so scared myself that I stayed busy practicing my own breathing pattern. Eventually an instructor came over and asked if I was ready to descend, so I said yes. Even though I tried to equalize on the way down, my right ear popped painfully, and I panicked and begged to go back up. The guide brought me up partway, and I managed to calm down and gave the signal that I was ready to try again. This time I made it to the bottom successfully, but I was having trouble staying there, so the guide clipped an extra weight onto me. But then I couldn’t get off the ocean floor, so she took it off again - and I began to rise. She chased after me and put it back on, and for the rest of the dive I was always barely above the bottom. It was difficult breathing through the regulator, but I settled down and it got easier - though never like breathing on land, because I always felt short of breath. I knew A was still at the surface with an instructor, so I remained focused on my guide and followed when it was time to follow. I figured the other guide knew A would be nearly blind, and would take care of her - little did I realize how wrong I was.

But meanwhile I followed my guide through the wreck and the reef. I could easily distinguish living things from manmade, but it was very hard to figure out what ship parts I was looking at. The fish were completely unafraid of us and swam right by; at one point my guide pointed to a fish and indicated it was yummy! I had no way to say “uh, I’m a vegetarian,” so I let it go. That’s one thing that was hard for me - resisting the urge to use sign language to communicate! I couldn’t even use “fish” or “boat” because no one would have understood.

This came back to bite me in the ass when the guide signaled “something-something OK?” I foolishly indicated “sure, OK” in reply, and was surprised when she started leading us (that’s me and another guy) through a tunnel. I figured I’d try it, and I was dismayed when my left ear popped painfully. Okay, “dismayed” isn’t right…I panicked! I told the guide I had a problem with my ear, and she signaled to the other guy to proceed out of the tunnel. She came back and pulled me out, and I tried the equalizing tricks we’d learned topside. By the time we were out of the tunnel I felt a bit better, and indicated I was okay.

So we looked around a bit more, with me trying to keep from sitting on the bottom the whole time. Eventually it was time to return topside, which was when I noticed A treading water at the surface, with no scuba gear on. I made my way over to the dive boat, anded over my fins, and climbed up the ladder. I staggered over to where I could take off my gear, and stripped everything off. Then I went over to the platform and called out to A, and she swam over and climbed aboard to join me.

I only found out later, at dinner, how bad her experience was. Nobody had checked to see if the prescription mask fit her face, which it didn’t, meaning it kept filling up with water. She managed to descend to the bottom, but her mask filled repeatedly and she asked to be taken topside. She was offered another mask, but was told that by that point it was too late for her to try descending again. She was told that she could just snorkle, but nobody gave her a snorkle. So she was just going to swim around, but she slipped on the boat and fell down, which was the culmination of a bad experience. Once she regained her composure, she did swim around for a while, which was what she was doing when I returned to the boat and called out to her.

Back in the office, she asked for a partial refund on the basis that no one checked to see if the mask fit her properly, and as a result she did not get to dive at all. The kid she was asking adamantly refused to refund any of the $110 cost, so I will be e-mailing the company owner to notify him that I intend to take it up with the credit card company. I had snagged a copy of the waiver we’d signed, and the way I interpret it is that my ear pain, which lasted all night, was covered by the waiver, but A not getting to dive because no one fitted her mask was not.

So we were pretty upset leaving there, and we were going to try for the Dockyard and a ferry back to Hamilton. We ended up taking the bus all the way back, but not before encountering a very sweet, very talkative kitty who begged for pets and sat on both our laps. So that made us feel a bit better.

We got back in time for dinner, though I was 15 minutes late for the Friends of Dorothy party and people were leaving. I said we’d schedule another one for the sea day going back, so I hope that will work out.