I would never have expected this, but Riki Wilchins of GenderPAC has just demonstrated a shocking stereotype related to gender presentation. In the news release A Father’s Lesson in ‘Manhood’ Deals Deadly Blow to Toddler Ms. Wilchins was quoted as saying:

This father - like countless fathers - was dead set on raising Clint Eastwood and not Alan Alda.

That comment made my jaw hit the floor so hard I just had to write back immediately.

I am astonished at the comparison Ms. Wilchins has just made between Clint Eastwood and Alan Alda. I would think that of all people, she should understand the hurt stereotyping can do. Clint Eastwood may match the American ideal of a “real man” but that is no reason to insult Alan Alda in this way. I am a longtime fan of his and I am just shocked by this. I’m sure even he would agree that he is no Clint Eastwood or John Wayne or the Marlboro Man - but I hardly think it is fair that he should receive this treatment from the executive director of an organization built on acceptance and diversity. Ms. Wilchins would have done much better to have left names of real people out of the picture altogether.

Whenever I wear a skirt to work, at least one person is guaranteed to say “I’ve never seen you wear a skirt before!” And whenever my hair is down instead of in a ponytail, at least one person will say “I didn’t realize how long your hair is!” Every time. Without fail.

I’m not sure why it’s so surprising to people that I wear skirts and have long hair. True, I only wear a skirt to work every four to six months or so, but as a female skirts are included in what general society has deemed acceptable for me to wear. I’m certainly not butch or masculine in the slightest, so it’s not like I’m bucking any stereotypes by wearing a skirt. I am simply more comfortable in pants, so I wear them 90% of the time for work and leisure.

As for my hair, I’m not sure why people are surprised by the length. When it’s in a low ponytail it still comes down to mid-back, and in a high ponytail (rarer) it’s down to at least the bottom of my shoulder blades. When it’s all the way down - completely unfettered - it reaches to the top of my butt in back and completely covers my breasts in front (indeed, it goes a couple of inches beyond them). Do people with short hair not realize that putting hair into a ponytail makes it appear shorter, and that if they see a ponytail they should expect the hair is actually longer than the bottom of the ponytail?

I’ve been browsing AlterMD.com [via savage love] this afternoon, looking at photographs of both male and female genital surgeries and reconstructions. The ones that are worth remarking on are a 15-year-old girl who had a labiaplasty (at fifteen!), corrections of some interesting penile deformities, and graphic photos of both MTF and FTM genital surgeries. (Warning: none of the pictures on this site are safe for work, and they’re probably not safe for the squeamish, either.)

After I finished looking at all the genital surgery photos, I clicked over to the cosmetic surgery pictures. This took me to a different site altogether - GaryAlterMD.com…I guess he doesn’t want his Botox injection patients getting scared off by wee-wees and hoo-hoos. Anyway, I was looking at the rhinoplasty page, which has front and side views of a woman pre- and post-operation. I thought “gee, she looks familiar” and went back to the transsexual facial surgery page. Sure enough, the first woman on the MTF page is the same woman pictured on the rhinoplasty page! Why is this amazing? Because the rhinoplasty page - the one sanitized for the public - makes no mention of the fact that this was part of transitioning from male to female. You’re supposed to notice the nose (it’s a nice nose, go ahead and notice it), not the person behind it, and that’s what the rhinoplasty page calls your attention to. When looking at the transsexual page many people would have “that’s a male” in their minds for the before picture…but it doesn’t matter for the rhinoplasty page. (Personally, I think she was attractive before the surgery, too, though I do agree the androgynous look has turned more feminine in the after pictures.)

I’m just really impressed at how well this doctor seems to treat trans issues.