I hate Hollister. And Aeropostale. And Abercrombie & Fitch. And all the other brands that jack up prices on ordinary items just because their name is on them. Hollister is the current fad from what I can tell (did know know their stores play music louder than OSHA allows?), and kids all over my school are wearing Hollister this and Hollister that.

I’m not talking about brands that are famous, mind you. Levi’s are famous because they are quality jeans. Converse is famous because Chuck Taylors have a distinct look. Pacific Sun has wild prints that they are known for. Even semi-existential brands like No Fear still stand for something - if you wear a No Fear shirt, you are conveying a message about yourself about being a daredevil, shirking authority, etc. Life is Good encourages being carefree, having an active lifestyle, etc. But Hollister and friends have none of these distinctions.

If you interrupted the assembly line at an Aeropostale factory before the name went on the clothes, you’d still have perfect normal, wearable clothes that would cost a lot less. The only association they can make is “we’re cool.” And therefore, if you wear Aeropostale, you’ll be cool too! That’s enough reason to jack up the price 40%, right? No! I don’t care if you think “oh but wearing Hollister shows that I like surfing and stuff,” it doesn’t. Wearing Hollister shows that you like Hollister, because there is absolutely nothing unique about the clothes they make. Like I said, I’m not talking about Puma shoes here, those are distinctive. But Seven jeans are just jeans.

And just in case anybody thinks I’m being a hypocrite, I want to mention that Hello Kitty does not fall under this category. The company’s name is Sanrio, and little girls don’t go ga-ga for Sanrio - they do it for Hello Kitty.

Wearing A&F says only one thing about you. It says that you are willing to pay extra for a regular t-shirt that happens to have their name on it. As always, I am open to discussion on this rant, but you will never get me to like Hollister.

On Saturday, we went to Leesburg Outlets, where I looked high and low for a pair of embellished jeans. In the entire mall I found exactly one pair that fit…except they were too long. One place I didn’t check was the Coldwater Creek outlet, because I figured they wouldn’t have that kind of thing. But I checked their website yesterday and they do have embellished jeans! We have a store locally, so today I called them up and asked if they had any in my size. They had two in the size below mine, and one in the size above…but none in my size. So I saved time by calling, but I had to order them over the web.

I almost never order clothes (other than t-shirts) online, and I wasn’t sure if I should get a petite size or not. The ones I tried on over the weekend were way too long, so I ended up ordering these in my size (petite), and these in my size (regular). Whichever fits, I’ll keep; the other I’ll return to the store in Tyson’s.

But good grief, they were expensive. They were $43 and $49 respectively, but shipping was $11! Because I live in a state where they have a brick and mortar store, taxes were an additional $4.65. If I had only ordered one pair, shipping would still have been $10, so I’m not losing too much that way - I’ll only lose half the tax when I end up returning one of them. But still - why on earth should two pairs of jeans cost $11 to ship? I’m quite certain I could put them into a flat rate Priority Mail box and send them off for $4.05…they are just raking in the dough with those extra shipping charges.

I got my DVD recorder and video stabilizer and set them up. I managed to get them working, but I didn’t have the remote control for the DVD recorder. It was mentioned in the auction as being missing, so that was fine, but it turns out a lot of the features are only accessible through the remote. I called up Panasonic to find out the part number, and with shipping it would be about $20 to have it sent. I said I’d think about it and order online. I finally decided I wanted it after all, so I can create chapter stops, etc. So just now I went to the Panasonic parts ordering site, and I selected the right remote and added it to my cart. I could see it in the cart, but in place of a “Proceed to Checkout” button was the following message in bold red text.

Parts and accessories may be ordered over the Internet Monday thru Saturday 6:00 am to 1:00 am EST. This site is currently available for Parts Pricing only. Please return during our normal business hours to place an order.

So do the tubes get clogged on Sundays? Is the Internet at church? WTF?

Thanks very much to Elizabeth for calling my attention to this Daily Kos update about Johnson & Johnson. It seems the AFA noticed J&J is advertising on LOGO, the new gay cable channel from MTV. The AFA took offense to this and is encouraging members to contact Johnson & Johnson and voice their opposition. So far the J&J people have gotten many more calls against their sponsorship of LOGO than they have gotten supporting their involvement in the gay community.

To contact Johnson & Johnson and express your support for their advertising on LOGO, call 1-800-962-5357, option 5 or 1-877-895-3665.

Oh boy, this is going to be a big mistake when it gets found out. A friend of mine just pointed me to this page, which links to a big fuck-up by somebody at CNN. I wouldn’t have believed it myself if I hadn’t seen it, but I made a screen capture of my own.

My girlfriend, who is a perfume aficionado (and rather knowledgable about the subject), sent me an article about two new perfumes from a company called Alex Max. They are “Gay Gal” and “Gay Guy,” and feature female and male pheromones (respectively). The “Gay Gal” perfume also has “more spice” than most women’s perfumes, and the “Gay Guy” perfume is more floral than most men’s perfumes. Because yes, of course, lesbians are butch and gay men are feminine! I’m sorry, but this just seems too silly for words. The company also has a perfume called “Metro Guy” for metrosexuals and another scent called “La Vie On Rose” - [sic], believe it or not.